Dear, sweet Edna.... She brings so much joy (and snot-spurting snorts of laughter) to my life.
As I've written before, Edna and her dear husband, Darth Vega (from now on referred to as DV) have four gorgeous little ones. A couple of them may even have been planned.
For years Edna has struggled with differing birth control methods as she's really sensitive to any sort of hormonal interference and unusually suspect of Big Pharma malfeasance. So they've tried a variety of methods, usually falling back to their Catholic fave, the rhythym method. (Enter into evidence, Your Honor, their family as an example of how reliable that is.)
*Let this blog in no way insinuate that any of the mini Ednas blessing our beautiful world are not, each and every one, entirely welcome and joyous.
So, ths last time Edna was pregged up the topic of The Big Snip came up with DV. Now TOM has done his fatherly duty and had this procedure and I'm happy to say we've never been happier! TOM has told DV about this miraculous endeavor, but DV has been a little, well, gun-shy to embrace this solution.
So last winter when Edna was first blooming with girl 4, DV said he thought he was ready to go for it. She relayed the good news and I encouraged her to have him go get it RIGHT THEN, while he thought it was a good idea. DV can be a bit... mercurial. I told her it was perfect timing. She was already pregged and by the time she was unpregged he'd be 6 months in on shooting blanks. Well... they dawdled. And then they had the ultrasound. Once DV heard it was another girl suddenly the Snip didn't sound so attractive. I'd warned her to strike while the iron was hot.
So I haven't heard anything about it in awhile, but then, yesterday, I got these texts. (Which are a real labor of love for Edna as she still uses a flip phone! (*snicker*)
Ok, so here is what DV is requesting. He wants Edna to drop her phone plan, which she clings to fiercely as she's always had the phone plans in her name. It's her weird little independence symbol. But she doesn't want to give it up. DV, on the other hand, just got on a family member's plan so he could upgrade to a new iphone and pay a ton less. So for Edna to do the same (and enter the 20-teens in phone tech) she would have to get on DV's family member's plan. Which she's not crazy about doing. But you know how that is... you like to be in control of your own bills, you know?
Well, DV evidently views this as some way that would make it harder for Edna to ever leave him if she ever wanted to do that. Something as ironclad as getting out of a phone contract with AT&T. Forget the other things that may keep her around when things get rocky... 4 kids... and a legal contract... and a promise before GOD! Those things are CAKE to get out of compared to shaking lose of those bastards at the phone company!
So, DV won't get clipped until Edna submits to the ultimate act of commitment: joining him on his phone's family plan. Thus... for Edna to get the family plan SHE needs (no more babies) she must accept another sort of family plan.
You see now how Edna keeps me laughing til my cheeks hurt.